eyes on the prize

had an amazing talk with a friend last night. we kinda started the talk through an argument and it eventually turned into a time of church. defensiveness turned into a night of affirmation and looking to Jesus. i was able to encourage and pray for a brother of mine and we got to praise God through it. what a blessed meeting that was!

we talked about how much God loves us. and how much we have a role to play in sharing with the younger ones what it is to love like Jesus. how we don't want to focus and change behaviors but the most important thing for us to aim for as leaders is their hearts! if we only focus on their behaviors when they haven't even encountered Jesus yet, then we're just teaching them to be hypocrites! we want them to get to know Jesus and actually encounter the living God, that's what matters! that they are saved, and once they come into that understanding, the Holy Spirit starts changing their lives!

we talked about persecution and loneliness. we talked about praying for people who don't understand us, even when they're in the church.

we talked about how the church is supposed to be a safe place. where all the walls and barriers are torn down. where Christians know that being called a Christian means that we're so bad and so sinful that we had to have the Son of God die for us on a cross. church is supposed to be the place where you can share all your baggage and burdens and ugly stuff that you have and not be judged. rather, it's a place where your family should be able to see your ugliness and be prayed for and loved and taken care of!

we talked about forgiving people and praying for people. even when they don't even acknowledge that they've done anything wrong to us! but that's the way Jesus loved people! He died for those who didn't even know what they were doing. we want to be good shepherds and love people the incredible way that Jesus loves us!

we talked about how Jesus is our everything! how we don't worship Him for what He gives us but simply because He is who He is. our Savior. He has already given everything, that is His identity. the God who saves! we love Him because the amazing love that He has that compelled Him to die on the cross for us! and even if everything, everything, everything is taken away, we will still rejoice because we have Jesus! He gave us Himself! the greatest gift of all! and our mission on this earth is to share this with others! to hopefully have them understand this peace and joy that comes out of that understanding. it's not peace and joy in the way the world understands it, it's so much more! peace and joy in the midst of everything being taken away, in persecution, and in loneliness. this is the peace and joy of Jesus, the man who gave Himself so that we could be together! so amazing.

what a great night. =]

with all of this there has been something else that i feel satan is trying to claw at me with. my idea of being jealous. of wanting an experience that someone else had. feeling like, "oh, i could be somewhere else right now, doing something cool." i keep comparing myself to other people. and it's something that's going to take a lot of praying and repenting to get out of me. i've been doing it for so long!

but it made me think of this verse from philippians 3, "no, dear brothers and sisters, i have not achieved it, but i focus on this on thing: forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, i press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us." i need to stop looking at the past, i need to keep my eyes ahead, on Jesus. i can't look left and right at the other people running the race. i need to run at my own pace, i can't be looking at other people and get discouraged that they're running faster than me. i just need to keep my eyes on the prize. keep my eyes on Jesus. =]

that's how i'm going to be a blessing to the world. when i look to the past, behind me, or to the sides at other people, i think about myself. i think about how inadequate i am or how frustrated i am that that is where i am compared to other people. but for me the best blessing to the world, i need to keep my eyes on Jesus! to keep my eyes on the source of my strength and love. that's how i'm going to glorify God. that's how Jesus is going to work through me. that's how i'm going to love, love, love without end. by me taking my eyes off of myself and others, and simply shifting the gaze to the prize. =]

help me run this race, Lord. strong and enduring. keeping my eyes on you. =]